Because Fuck You I’m the Dungeon Master.

Because Fuck You I’m the Dungeon Master.

Beware the Smiling Dungeon Master.

Beware the Smiling Dungeon Master.

Charisma is my Dump Stat. So Fuck Off.

Charisma is my Dump Stat. So Fuck Off.

Crit Happens

Crit Happens

Don’t Start No Shit, Won’t Be No Crit.

Don’t Start No Shit, Won’t Be No Crit.

Dungeon Masturbator

Dungeon Masturbator

It’s All Fun and Games Until Someone Fails a Saving Throw.

It’s All Fun and Games Until Someone Fails a Saving Throw.

My Dice Get More Ones Than Your Mom’s Thong During a Good Shift.

My Dice Get More Ones Than Your Mom’s Thong During a Good Shift.

I Believe You’ll Find That Rule Clearly Spelled Out on Page Fuck You I’m the Dungeon Master.

I Believe You’ll Find That Rule Clearly Spelled Out on Page Fuck You I’m the Dungeon Master.

Rolling Dice Builds Character.

Rolling Dice Builds Character.

This is How I Roll.

This is How I Roll.

When the DM Smiles, It’s Already Too Late.

When the DM Smiles, It’s Already Too Late.

World’s Okayest Dungeon Master.

World’s Okayest Dungeon Master.

Because I’m the DM. That’s Why.

Because I’m the DM. That’s Why.

Carpe DM

Carpe DM

Chaotic Stupid is Not an Alignment.

Chaotic Stupid is Not an Alignment.

Definitely Not a Mimic

Definitely Not a Mimic

Dungeon Master Literally God

Dungeon Master Literally God

I Put the D in Dungeon Master. I Needed the XP.

I Put the D in Dungeon Master. I Needed the XP.

Jesus Saves! Everyone Else Takes 4d6 Points of Damage.

Jesus Saves! Everyone Else Takes 4d6 Points of Damage.

No, Really. What Do You Do?

No, Really. What Do You Do?

Rocks Fall. Everyone Dies.

Rocks Fall. Everyone Dies.

The Dice Giveth and the Dice Taketh Away.

The Dice Giveth and the Dice Taketh Away.

Tread Lightly. You Look Like Just Enough XP to Level Up.

Tread Lightly. You Look Like Just Enough XP to Level Up.

When the DM Smiles, It’s Because Your Mom is Under the Table.

When the DM Smiles, It’s Because Your Mom is Under the Table.

You Can Certainly Try…

You Can Certainly Try…

Before You Do That, Roll Me an Intelligence Check to See if Your Character is as Stupid as You Are.

Before You Do That, Roll Me an Intelligence Check to See if Your Character is as Stupid as You Are.

Chaotic Neutral Because Fuck You

Chaotic Neutral Because Fuck You

Charisma is my Dump Stat.

Charisma is my Dump Stat.

Don’t Hate the Player. Hate the DM.

Don’t Hate the Player. Hate the DM.

Dungeon Master

Dungeon Master

Intelligence is my Dump Stat.

Intelligence is my Dump Stat.

Lawful in the Streets, Chaotic in the Sheets.

Lawful in the Streets, Chaotic in the Sheets.

NPC Lives Matter

NPC Lives Matter

Roll for Initiative

Roll for Initiative

There are 20 Sides to every Story.

There are 20 Sides to every Story.

What Doesn’t Kill Me Gives Me XP.

What Doesn’t Kill Me Gives Me XP.

Wisdom is my Dump Stat.

Wisdom is my Dump Stat.